This post is part of our YogaDork State of the Union collection sharing reflections on 2014 and also holding purposes and forecasts for 2015.


For lots of, the drop of the sphere has long been an alarm bell to ‘repair’ what we don’t such as concerning ourselves so we will really feel much better. We resolve to be thinner, healthier, wealthier, a lot more ambitious, much more confident, etc.

However, our impulse to ‘alter’ ourselves, or our problems, is typically driven by a further subconscious wish to stay clear of, cover, or numb out just what we are truly feeling. For instance, permit me inform you a bit concerning my annual desire to reduce bangs.

No matter the amount of times in the past I have REGRETFULLY reduced my hair in bangs, I still obtain the impulse to do it. (Gents, please bear with me. This could appear like a female point, but it will certainly reverberate by the end.)

The desire consistently begins the exact same way … I’m obtaining dressed, doing my hair in front of the mirror and I begin drawing my hair right into various styles, and just before I get clear that I am actually just really exhausted, aggravated, or just in a mysterious discontent mood I determine, ‘I need a new hair cut. I need to reduce booms.’

Now, below is the crazy component. I know, with ONE HUNDRED % certainty, I don’t like exactly how bangs appearance on me. My hair does not bang well. Each time I have actually reduced them (15 times perhaps) I call my dear close friend Nicole the following day and I ask, “Guarantee me that you will certainly never permit me reduce bangs again.”

Truthfully after my last booms cut in 2009, I thought I finally learned my lesson and also truly understood that it had not been ‘the solution’ to the deeper feeling of angst.

So, I was actually astonished last month, when I discovered myself shamefully trolling the Web for example bang hairstyles. And, I also made an appointment.

Aware I was on the side, I utilized my last line of defense. I e-mailed Nicole my Google hair cut results, “Scroll to the last design. What do you believe? Am I a nut case? Still with the booms …”

And while I wasn’t really sure just what I wished her feedback to be, say thanks to god she composed back, “You made me assure to chat you from this discussion if you ever brought it up once more! Put the scissors down as well as stroll away slowly. Love, Nicole.”

I canceled my appointment.

But truth is, I still really felt unclear. And also while I was alleviated I didn’t reduce my bangs this moment, I still needed to rest with this anxious antsy sensation inside. I was not comfortable. Over the program of the day, or possibly 2, the uneasyness ultimately lessened (and my hair was in tact!)

As Pema Chodron educates, “The even more we witness our emotional reactions and understand exactly how they function, the less complicated it is to refrain.”

As a society, we are not motivated to totally experience or loosen up with pain or rocking. As an alternative we are urged to prevent it, to fix it, to do something ‘else’ – reduce our hair, go shopping, eat sweets, have a beverage, examine our apple iphone, download and install an application, switch on the TELEVISION, or other numbing task. Typically our fast repair, while at first easing, leaves us really feeling even worse in the end.

However, if we could find out to stop briefly long enough – without avoiding or responding – we may discover that either the uneasy sensation naturally dissipates, or that the discomfort we are running from could not be as unbearable as we thought, or that there is some deeper knowledge readily available to us within this nervous state. Some dazzling truth comes to be much more clear about just what really requires to shift or change.

“… feelings like disappointment, embarrassment, irritation, bitterness, anger, envy, and also concern, instead of being bad news, are actually very clear moments that instruct us where it is that we’re holding back. They teach us to cheer up as well as lean in when we feel we prefer to break down and pull back. They resemble carriers that reveal us, with terrifying quality, specifically where we’re stuck. This very moment is the perfect educator, as well as, blessed for us, it’s with us any place we are.” – Pema Chodron

Over time, our yoga as well as meditation method can aid us find out to ‘stop briefly’ prior to we grab alleviation or respond allowing us rather to cultivate even more patience, as well as a capability to stay open with our soreness as well as the pain of others. And hopefully, most significantly, the pause can assist us make less-regrettable decisions. (Or a minimum of not reduce booms … again!)

‘Between stimulus and reaction there is a space. During that space exists our liberty as well as power to pick our feedback. In our response exists our development and flexibility.” – Viktor Frankl

Eventually, pausing a lot more, we discover that our everyday, moment-to-moment actions normally end up being much more straightened and also with, and reflective of, our much deeper objectives and ambitions. That our thoughts, words, and also activities naturally harmonize. And also as Gandhi instructed, this is happiness: ‘When on exactly what you believe, state as well as do are in harmony.’

May it be A Happy New Year for you, your enjoyed ones, and also all beings!